Past

Relationships change a lot... just be the sheer existence of my being. Friendships, family, whatever.

One week seems like forever, and I can't write it all here, simply because people I know in real life read this.

Shortly?

I am behind on homework.

Is there anything else to say? Being behind sucks because it dominates my life. I need to do so much work just to catch up - and yet students in my class have work they haven't done from last quarter. 5 essays I need to make up, then 4 to write for this week and a presentation.

I went on a walk on wednesday... I only had my apt keys and my phone in my pockets, and I was so very VERY tempted to keep walking. I need time without people, but it is so hard to get. I need to go on more walks by myself. And with my iPod being lost/stolen/disappeared... I listen more.

I wonder what happened to Nathaniel Chusid. Oh, the lovely thing called facebook can, and did just tell me. I wonder if he remembers the shit he did? I wonder if he cares. Something that shaped my life could literally be a blip on his memory. And I want to ask, but can't. Won't let myself. My reaction to seeing a picture of him in a town paper a year or so ago was very visceral and angry and surprised the hell out of me.

Well, yet another rambling post. The only thing that connects these topics is my mind.

Crying sucks, but I wish I could have a good cry more often then I do. I can remember the last serious soul-wrenching cry I had. March 7th, this year.

Probably going to cry now, but not the kind that makes you feel better.

The kind that makes me miss my Mommy.