Flyrun/Runfly

Do you ever get this feeling like... you need to go run, but not even just run... go BE. Like you wouldn't exist at all unless you were in motion or fully seeing within yourself.

Rambling, I know... but I just can't sleep. Its a mood I sometimes call "Plane Ticket"

I have all these images in my head of places/people/things that I KNOW I will see one day, as long as I choose the right choices. Like... images of forests, towns, eyes that will someday match with a persons face. But the choices, every choice modifies the path we are on. It is WHY we can look back and go "oh, that caused that."

I get this way sometimes, and right now we are not EVEN at the stage of an echo within... This is the mildest form of this feeling. Ariel, when there was that one day where we went and walked... That was maybe a 3/8 on the scale of this feeling.

I couldn't sleep at all last night, eventually stopped keeping track around 3 am. Same general idea of a feeling. And I had a fantastic rhythm of a piece in my head and it was PERFECT. I didn't write it down, but I know someday I will find it again.

To quote myself:
"I constantly feel like I am a ball of energy kept together by nothing more than skin and will. The only ways I have found of siphoning off enough for me to be able to function are as follows: run, drive, paint, explore, listen to certain songs on repeat, orgasm, laugh, cry, dance, swim, write, get nude and just BE. I don't know what that says about me, nor do I really care much. Truth, it is."

Tonight, I will flyrun/runfly down paths of my mind, and if I lose parts of myself within, the better off I am. My self is... fractured. Imperfect. Lovely. Shiny. Faceted.